Supposed to be the adult

The number of parents cheering the childish destruction of this father’s teenage daughter’s laptop with a .45 pistol perhaps highlights why parents aren’t always the highest authority on appropriate parenting.

You, sir, are supposed to be the adult.

UPDATE: Apparently Mr Jordan claims that the police – far from being concerned about his going around firing pistols at things to “teach” his daughter “lessons”, actually complimented him.

Insane.

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32 responses to “Supposed to be the adult

  1. When in doubt, guns are the answer. Wonderful message to send to children.

  2. I’m OK with this. The kid sounds like a spoiled brat who needs to be taught a lesson.

    Back in the old days she probably would have just gotten a hiding. Confiscating the laptop (which is all this was once you take all the melodrama out) doesn’t seem particularly outrageous.

  3. Seems like fairly minor teenage behaviour to me. What isn’t minor is going so far from confiscating the laptop to wilfully destroying it. With a gun.

  4. Next video in the series: I Don’t Understand Why My Teenage Daughter Ran Away.

    I had to stop the video half-way through – didn’t even get to the gun – because I wanted to smack him in the face for being such a control freak asshole that humiliating his daughter online is considered good parenting.

    Teenagers don’t like doing chores, back talk their parents, and complain about same to their friends? Who would have thought?

  5. Seems like fairly minor teenage behaviour to me.

    Somehow I doubt it’s the first time.

    What isn’t minor is going so far from confiscating the laptop to wilfully destroying it. With a gun.

    It’s pretty much guaranteed to be his property, so he can do whatever the hell he wants with it.

    You seem pretty hung up on this gun thing. Would you be so offended if he’d just thrown it into a passing garbage truck ?

  6. I had to stop the video half-way through – didn’t even get to the gun – because I wanted to smack him in the face for being such a control freak asshole that humiliating his daughter online is considered good parenting.

    Perhaps he’s trying to make the point about the goose and the gander ?

    Teenagers don’t like doing chores, back talk their parents, and complain about same to their friends? Who would have thought?

    Ah. So disrespecting the people who make your life of leisure possible, telling them they owe you something because of it and thinking this won’t have any consequences are behaviours that shouldn’t be discouraged ? Maybe if you’re trying to raise a politician or banker, I suppose…

  7. narcoticmusing

    Our youth now love luxury. They have bad manners, contempt for authority; they show disrespect for their elders and love chatter in place of exercise; they no longer rise when elders enter the room; they contradict their parents, chatter before company; gobble up their food and tyrannize their teachers.
    -Socrates

  8. Splatterbottom

    Brilliant quote, Narcotic.

  9. Every generation thinks that the one that comes after them is more violent, less respectful,and the world is worse.

    In all seriousness, isn’t he doing exactly what he is punishing his child for doing? His issue is she took to the internet to bitch about her parents. So what does his Dad do?

  10. So disrespecting the people who make your life of leisure possible

    “Disrespecting”. Like his shooting the laptop with a gun didn’t earn him much more. He is objectively difficult to respect.

    telling them they owe you something because of it

    She thought they should pay her for chores, which isn’t unreasonable. Of course, he could charge her in return for the things they give her, so she might rescind that demand in those circumstances.

    and thinking this won’t have any consequences are behaviours that shouldn’t be discouraged ?

    Not with wanton property destruction and internet shaming, no.

  11. In all seriousness, isn’t he doing exactly what he is punishing his child for doing? His issue is she took to the internet to bitch about her parents. So what does his Dad do?

    Exactly. What’s that quote about apples and trees?

  12. If the dad had made her attend religious classes at school, none of this would have happened.

  13. In all seriousness, isn’t he doing exactly what he is punishing his child for doing? His issue is she took to the internet to bitch about her parents. So what does his Dad do?

    His issue was that she’s a spoiled brat taking things for granted.

  14. “Disrespecting”. Like his shooting the laptop with a gun didn’t earn him much more. He is objectively difficult to respect.

    Because he chose a dramatic way of making a point ?

    She thought they should pay her for chores, which isn’t unreasonable.

    Yes, it is.

    Even more so when the “chores” were such trivialities as wiping down benches, sweeping and getting a coffee.

    If she was, say, working in the family store, then that’s something that might be worthy of a wage. Doing the shit at home you should be doing anyway because it’s just a basic form of respect for the people who feed you and put a roof over your head, is not.

  15. When I first saw this post and video I thought “Ooh! I’m going to like this guy!”
    Maybe because the freeze frame shows him sitting in an Adirondack chair in a rural setting, I was expecting some tough love with a good helping of ‘country-folk’ common sense.

    What we ended up with was an inarticulate rant by a Redneck sook who thought that his daughter was an ungrateful bitch.
    Whether she’s a bitch, or not, is not ours to judge.
    However. I think it’s fair to say that she’s ungrateful.
    What 16 year isn’t??

    Nevertheless, what made me uncomfortable is that he never mentioned that, though he’s disapointed and angry with her, he still loves her and is doing this for that reason.
    He treated her like some politician that pissed him off.
    This wasn’t tough love, this was revenge.

    The other thing that really freaked me out was the manner in which he destroyed the laptop.
    Had he opened it up, place it on a fence post and blasted it with a shotgun, well.. point made.
    Had he opened it up on the ground a drove over it with the ride-on mower in the background, then.. even better.
    But leaving it on the ground, closed (I don’t why, but that’s freaky) and emptying his .45 clip into it as though it was a person really gave me the creeps.
    Farmer Joe has a ride-on and a shotgun, but only a lunatic has a .45 and a grudge.

    Cheers.

  16. Because he chose a dramatic way of making a point ?

    No. Because he violently destroyed property. There are no circumstances in which shooting a laptop with a handgun is sensible. The main point he made was that he’s a violent psycho.

  17. No. Because he violently destroyed property.

    Wow. You should never go to a party with a Piñata.

    There are no circumstances in which shooting a laptop with a handgun is sensible.

    Zillions of people who enjoy target shooting would disagree.

    The main point he made was that he’s a violent psycho.

    What ? You’ve never punched a pillow ? Smacked your hand on a desk ? Stamped your foot ?

  18. “His issue was that she’s a spoiled brat taking things for granted”

    No, his issue was she was a spoiled brat ON FACEBOOK. He stated so explicitly when he mentioned she had been grounded for doing something similar.

    Point being, quite frankly he’s a spoiled little brat as well. When I was a teenager, my parents certainly couldn’t have afforded to shoot a perfectly good laptop simply because he can’t be bothered doing some actual parenting. Few could afford that. No wonder his daughter is growing up taking things for granted when he sets such a sterling example of doing exactly the same himself.

  19. No, his issue was she was a spoiled brat ON FACEBOOK.

    And here I was thinking that statements like “you will NEVER refer to her as a cleaning lady again”, “there’s a list of chores […] and you’re not doing them”, “you want to be paid for basic chores” made it pretty clear where the real grievances were. But then again, maybe I was the only one listening instead of laughing at the stupid American redneck.

    The connection to Facebook was simply that it made it easier for ol’ Dad to find out what an ungrateful little snot his daughter was. Back in the good old days, parents would find out about this kind of thing from other parents (or teachers) who had overheard children talking.

    When I was a teenager, my parents certainly couldn’t have afforded to shoot a perfectly good laptop simply because he can’t be bothered doing some actual parenting. Few could afford that.

    When you were a teenager, computers literally cost 10x what they do now in real terms. These days cheap ones are nearly disposable (hence perfect for irresponsible children). That laptop was probably worth less than a few hundred dollars. If he’s a moderately well paid IT worker, even in the US, that’ll be under a day’s take-home pay. Hardly a fiscal calamity.

    Incidentally, it apparently hasn’t crossed anyone’s mind this guy might not consider himself being lazy at all. He may simply be applying the age old parenting technique of demonstrating a consequence of unacceptable behaviour is loss of privileges, and merely choosing a dramatic and contemporary way of doing it. In the past parents have sold bikes, thrown away or locked up toys, emptied swimming pools, refused to pay mobile phone bills, or simply fed a fussy eater’s dinner to the dog.

  20. Every generation thinks that the one that comes after them is more violent, less respectful,and the world is worse.

    This time, they might actually be right. The unrestrained greed of the Baby Boomers is leaving a hell of a mess behind it – the GFC, massive real estate bubbles and climate change being but a few examples. “Gen X” and followers could be the first generations in history that don’t end up with significantly greater wealth and living standards than their antecedent.

  21. Wouldn’t he have achieved the same goal in a less entitled way by formatting the computer and donating it to charity?

  22. That’s a pretty grotesque abuse of the word “entitled”, Jeremy. Unless you want to try and construct an argument that anyone who chooses to waste their money (let’s say, on going to the movies) rather than giving it to charity, is acting in an “entitled way”.

    If this guy was some multi-gazillionaire cackling about how he was so rich he could get away with anything, then burning his mansion to the ground for an insurance scam, then yeah, you might have a point.

    But it’s not. It’s his laptop. He can do whatever he wants with it. That’s not “entitlement”, it’s basic property rights. He’s the only person suffering an actual loss and making no attempt to try and get someone else to bear that loss on his behalf. That’s about as far from “entitled” as you can get.

  23. LOL. The Right loves this guy because:

    a) he’s from the American South;
    b) he likes shooting handguns; and
    c) they think “insensitive asshole” is an aspirational goal.

    And the Left hates him because . . . well . . . mainly because the Right likes him so much. He’s like a US version of the “Chk Chk Boom” girl.

  24. Wow. You should never go to a party with a Piñata.

    A pinata is something that is made to be destroyed. In a game. Laptops, not so much. See the difference now?

    Zillions of people who enjoy target shooting would disagree.

    Again, I really feel you’re being deliberately disingenuous in comparing what happened here with people shooting inanimate objects in organised sports – objects which were made to be shot in those sports. Because they’re self-evidently not at all the same. Targets are made to be shot. In sport. Different from laptops.

    What ? You’ve never punched a pillow ? Smacked your hand on a desk ? Stamped your foot ?

    Yes, I have. But I’ve never shot someone else’s laptop with a handgun, filmed myself doing it and then posted the footage on the internet.

  25. narcoticmusing

    What ? You’ve never punched a pillow ? Smacked your hand on a desk ? Stamped your foot ?

    As Buns points out, this was hardly a spontaneous action. This father was teaching his daughter that the way to solve a problem you have with another person is to destroy their property and humiliate them. How is that a good lesson for a child to learn? He is the adult, not her. Thus he must be judged on different standards to her.

  26. “But then again, maybe I was the only one listening instead of laughing at the stupid American redneck

    How ridiculous. Exactly where have I suggested I either found anything remotely amusing about this or that I think this man is a “redneck”? Attack an argument on it’s merit or you’re wasting your time responding to me. Unless your objective is to make yourself look like a tool, in which case, ad hom away.

    “These days cheap ones are nearly disposable “

    A cheap laptop is still several hundred dollars. And if this man (or indeed anyone else) considers a days wages disposable, I’d say they have more money than sense. Certainly a days loss of income for me would be significant, as would it be to most people. And I’m not sure if you’ve noticed, but going to a movie (whilst the popcorn IS expensive) costs nowhere near a days wages. The two are not comparable.

    I know the value of money because I saw how hard my parents worked for it. Nothing was treated as “disposable” because we couldn’t afford to replace anything. Exactly how is he teaching her gratitude and the value of money by acting like an irresponsible cowboy? What lessons does she take from that? When her friends talk about it, it’s the time her father went nuts and shot a laptop. The message is lost.

    “He’s the only person suffering an actual loss and making no attempt to try and get someone else to bear that loss on his behalf”

    Considering the fact that it’s nigh on impossible to get through school now without access to a computer, he’s either going to need to replace it, or his daughter WILL suffer a loss. Unless he’s willing to cut into his Shoot Things, Video Tape Them Then Upload To Youtube time and let her use his computer, that is.

    Someone who treats several hundred dollars worth of possession as disposable would certainly seem to not know the value of money. Or effective parenting techniques for that matter. Parents should be able to engage with their children, rather than having to take out a firearm and destroy an expensive piece of equipment to make a point. Given she had been a little brat on Facebook, I would have thought that having the discussion on Facebook in full view of her friends – as she had done – would have been a more lasting way of making the point. It would also make her think about the fact that she – like her father would have been – was transmitting that view to an audience. That audience also would have thought twice about doing the same thing, and the lesson would be reinforced throughout her peer group. When she’s thinking about it later, she would be thinking about the arguments he’d made. This way, in ten years time when she looks back on it, it’s going to be the story about how her father shot her laptop, not the time when she learnt something about gratitude.

    Even taking it away and making her get a part-time job to earn the value of it would have been a more effective lesson. What’s the first thing you think about now? A gun. Not exactly an effective way to make a point.

  27. A pinata is something that is made to be destroyed. In a game. Laptops, not so much. See the difference now?

    Ah. So “wanton destruction of property” is OK, depending on the type of property.

    Where do we draw the line here ? Are kids having a food fight ok ? How about a demolition derby ?

    Again, I really feel you’re being deliberately disingenuous in comparing what happened here with people shooting inanimate objects in organised sports – objects which were made to be shot in those sports. Because they’re self-evidently not at all the same. Targets are made to be shot. In sport. Different from laptops.

    Zillions of people happily take things like bottles, buckets, computer screens, fridges, etc, out into the countryside and enjoy some target shooting with them.

    Calling someone a “violent psycho” because they do that doesn’t even make the grade for disingenuous. It’s just a flat-out insult.

    Yes, I have. But I’ve never shot someone else’s laptop with a handgun, filmed myself doing it and then posted the footage on the internet.

    It wasn’t someone else’s laptop, it was his. And while you might not have filmed yourself doing things and posted them on the internet, lots of people do. I’ve heard there’s whole websites full of videos like that.

  28. Dr Smithy: More violent and less respectful? We’re not the ones who ruined the economy, and in the US it’s the generally older Tea Party who bring weapons to protests rather than the generally younger Occupiers.

  29. How ridiculous. Exactly where have I suggested I either found anything remotely amusing about this or that I think this man is a “redneck”? Attack an argument on it’s merit or you’re wasting your time responding to me. Unless your objective is to make yourself look like a tool, in which case, ad hom away.

    Thanks for satisfying my RDI of irony for today.

    A cheap laptop is still several hundred dollars. And if this man (or indeed anyone else) considers a days wages disposable, I’d say they have more money than sense. Certainly a days loss of income for me would be significant, as would it be to most people.

    So because some people have lower incomes, those who don’t should feel guilty because they spend a couple of hundred dollars on something “disposable” like a night out on the town or taking their car on a track day ?

    I know the value of money because I saw how hard my parents worked for it. Nothing was treated as “disposable” because we couldn’t afford to replace anything. Exactly how is he teaching her gratitude and the value of money by acting like an irresponsible cowboy?

    Well, that might be the part where he explained that if she wants another laptop, she’ll need to actually go out and earn the money herself to buy it. But you probably didn’t hear that, either.

    Considering the fact that it’s nigh on impossible to get through school now without access to a computer, he’s either going to need to replace it, or his daughter WILL suffer a loss. Unless he’s willing to cut into his Shoot Things, Video Tape Them Then Upload To Youtube time and let her use his computer, that is.

    I’d say it’s a pretty safe bet there’s at least one other computer in the house, probably several.

    Someone who treats several hundred dollars worth of possession as disposable would certainly seem to not know the value of money.

    Or maybe he earns enough that he feels several hundred dollars worth of possession is a reasonable expense for teaching a bratty child a lesson.

    You know that whole “if you two don’t quit it I’m turning the car around and going home” spiel that some parents use ? Well, a few of them actually carry through with it, and it can easily cost them hundreds of dollars to abandon a holiday, even a short one. That’s but one example.

    Given she had been a little brat on Facebook, I would have thought that having the discussion on Facebook in full view of her friends – as she had done – would have been a more lasting way of making the point.

    Wow. You can’t have spent much time on the Internet, if you think any sort of rational discussion like that would happen.

    It would also make her think about the fact that she – like her father would have been – was transmitting that view to an audience. That audience also would have thought twice about doing the same thing, and the lesson would be reinforced throughout her peer group.

    Ok. So a few posts back you were castigating Dad for public humiliation, now you’re saying that what he should have done, just without the shooting ?

    When she’s thinking about it later, she would be thinking about the arguments he’d made. This way, in ten years time when she looks back on it, it’s going to be the story about how her father shot her laptop, not the time when she learnt something about gratitude.

    It must have been a long, long time since you had anything to do with teenagers if you think that’s how it would have played out. Poor old Dad’s attempts at peaceful negotiation would have been met with howls of laughter, insults, and badly photoshopped photos.

    Even taking it away and making her get a part-time job to earn the value of it would have been a more effective lesson. What’s the first thing you think about now? A gun. Not exactly an effective way to make a point.

    Not everyone (particularly in America) has an irrational fear of guns. I imagine what will be remembered is how doing the wrong thing resulted in losing the laptop. Whether that was done by throwing it off a nearby bridge, giving it away, or going Pulp Fiction on it is a matter of semantics.

  30. We’re not the ones who ruined the economy, and in the US it’s the generally older Tea Party who bring weapons to protests rather than the generally younger Occupiers.

    Tea Partiers bring weapons to protests because they’re paranoid fanatics, though I’m struggling to see how that is relevant to this discussion.

  31. “It must have been a long, long time since you had anything to do with teenagers if you think that’s how it would have played out”

    Apart from being one less than ten years ago you mean? I would refer you to about a hundred posts on Failbook where the parent interrupts a screed by an ungrateful child, and the reaction of the friends is very different to what you describe. But hey! Why let reality get in the way of a good insult?

    “So because some people have lower incomes, those who don’t should feel guilty because they spend a couple of hundred dollars on something “disposable” like a night out on the town or taking their car on a track day ?”

    Who on EARTH spends a couple of hundred dollars on a night out and doesn’t recognise that it is actually a fair bit of money? Who takes their “car on the track” regularly? Who would consider that kind of money disposable? It’s not SOME people,but the the vast majority of the rest of the world who is not wealthy enough to be so cavalier. Not realising that is incredibly ungrateful.

    “Ok. So a few posts back you were castigating Dad for public humiliation, now you’re saying that what he should have done, just without the shooting?”

    I think you’ll find that my issue was him bitching about her taking to Facebook and whingeing about something, and then promptly taking to Youtube to do exactly the same thing. If he had addressed the actual issue and not the fact that it was on Facebook – you know, like an adult – then I would have had no problem.

  32. Apart from being one less than ten years ago you mean? I would refer you to about a hundred posts on Failbook where the parent interrupts a screed by an ungrateful child, and the reaction of the friends is very different to what you describe. But hey! Why let reality get in the way of a good insult?

    A hundred, eh ? Sounds about right.

    Who on EARTH spends a couple of hundred dollars on a night out and doesn’t recognise that it is actually a fair bit of money?

    Whole swathes of late twentysomethings and early thirtysomethings on $80k+ incomes probably spend at least that much going out every week. Especially in Sydney – $7 for a beer, $10 for a mixer, $30+ for a taxi ride home – doesn’t take long to add up.

    Who takes their “car on the track” regularly?

    Driving enthusiasts. A lot more “regularly” than this guy empties a clip into a laptop, as well.

    Who would consider that kind of money disposable?

    Somehow I don’t think we’re on the same wavelength here. I used the term “disposable” in the context of something happening maybe once a year. You seem to believe I used it in the context of something happening every day.

    It’s not SOME people,but the the vast majority of the rest of the world who is not wealthy enough to be so cavalier. Not realising that is incredibly ungrateful.

    Yeah. Because “the rest of the world” is such a relevant comparison here. Melodramatic much ?

    I think you’ll find that my issue was him bitching about her taking to Facebook and whingeing about something, and then promptly taking to Youtube to do exactly the same thing.

    Which, like I said the last time, spectacularly missed what was actually the cause of offence.

    If he had addressed the actual issue and not the fact that it was on Facebook – you know, like an adult – then I would have had no problem.

    If you had, you know, listened to what he was actually saying, you might have noticed that it being posted on Facebook was a minor issue.

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