A Big Party’s Lament

What do you want, Australia?

When you told us it was a bit unfair that so little of those huge mining profits were coming back to the taxpayer, we promised a mining tax to claw some of it back.

Then you saw some frankly pretty well-produced ads from the mining industry (seriously, you’ve got to admire what huge amounts of money to a good advertising agency can achieve) and changed your mind. So we changed leaders and changed our minds too.

And the ads didn’t stop, and still you hated us for it!


You asked us to tackle climate change and so we talked with the other big party, and came up with a scheme that enabled us to say we were doing something but in reality deferred any action till the 2030s and gave the benefit from any actions you make to the big polluters (and also a huge whack of your money) but you didn’t mind that, you thought the ETS was an actual climate policy.

But then the other big party suddenly abandoned the scheme by changing leaders to one who thought climate change was crap, and you didn’t mind! So we thought, alright, apparently this stuff doesn’t matter to you guys any more and abandoned it too – and you hated us for it!


You told us you didn’t like Kevin Rudd any more because he was trying to give you what you had said you wanted on climate change and standing up for working families (something you liked us talking about in 2007 but now apparently think is funny – what gives?), so we replaced him with a leader you told us you did like.

And you got angry with us about that! According to the best data, you wanted to be rid of Kevin, so we did that and you complained that you wanted to do it yourself even though the only other way to do that would’ve been to make Tony Abbott PM which you also said you didn’t want to do. We gave you the more popular leader and you decided that you’d rather we had stuck with the less popular one.


And then the election campaign. We tried hard not to offend you. We caved in on all our old principles, leaving the Greens to represent the lefties, and chased you, the swinging voter who can’t choose between the Coalition and Labor. We offered you everything you asked for – paranoia about boats, tax cuts, out and out bribes. All without cutting any public services, which you say you don’t want us to do.

We’ve done everything you asked. We’ve let small groups of you lead us around by the nose, and you’re still not happy.

Frankly, I’m not sure why we even bother.

You’ve let us down, terribly.

4 responses to “A Big Party’s Lament

  1. weewillywinkee

    We want honesty and integrety coupled with strong leadership. This is why we’ve abandoned you and voted Greens.

  2. usesomesanity

    Our politicans just have to cooperate and now the greens should get us the oringal super profit taxes put on mining for OUR resources they dig up and sell. And banking super profits tax which pay for what WE bail out when they fail!

    This is why we’ve abandoned you and voted Greens.

  3. jordanrastrick

    With the parliament the way it is, we’ll be lucky to see even the Minerals Tax that Labor took to the election – assuming there’s even an ALP government, they’d have to convince three conservative independents to pass the bill. But sure, after massive swings against Labor in mining dependent sections of the country, you can continue maintain that Labor are scum for the heinous sin of taking a weakened version of their own risky policy reform to the electorate. I mean the Greens did brilliantly right? 10% of the primary vote, concentrated heavily in places like Melbourne and Grayndler – that proves that, like, 70% of the population was behind the original RPST! Of course it does!

    As for a banking profits super tax, I don’t see why banks as opposed to insurance companies or airlines or retailers or any other major corporations deserve to be singled out for higher taxation. The Australian government didn’t have to bail our banks out – maybe you’re thinking of Europe or America?

  4. usesomesanity

    Bank deposit guarantees happened here. Govenment guarantees so banks could borrow HAPPENED here.

    I didnt get a govenment guarantees so I could borrow.

    If they pass a law to say they will never bail out a bank, then they can escape the banking profits super tax, but until such time why should banking shareholders be insured by the Australian people without paying for the privledge?

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