Sue Ann Post writes in the King’s Tribune that she’s a lesbian who is not interested in being monogamous, and is not interested in getting married. Which is her own business, and none of mine.
What IS my business, and that of any person opposed to pointless discrimination against people based on their gender, is that Sue uses her personal choice (well, not choice, since it’s presently made by the state for her) to justify advocating that the law continue to discriminate against other lesbians and gay people:
Let me say up front that as someone who has been ‘out’ as a lesbian for 27 years, I just don’t get this push for gay marriage. I don’t understand why it has become a headline issue in the push for equal human rights, especially when our rights in other areas are being slowly eroded by some state governments. In the ‘80s we fought for the right to be different. Now it seems that we’re fighting for the right to be the same. I don’t get it.
Having our relationships recognised as valid and legal is one thing, but why on earth go as far as wanting to get married? I’m not the only one who thinks this way. One of the saddest things I’ve seen at a Pride March was two years ago where a lone, brave man carried a sign saying, ‘I don’t want to get married. Do I still belong?’
Of course you bloody belong. The point is that the government shouldn’t be denying you that choice. And Sue-Ann, fighting for equality is fighting for the right to be TREATED equally even though we’re all different.
It infuriates me when someone from a discriminated-against group decides they’re not interested in the thing denied them – as is of course their right – but then takes the absurd leap to asserting that it doesn’t matter if it’s denied to other discriminated-against people who do want to partake in the thing denied them.
It’s incredibly selfish and arrogant – why should her sexuality give her the right to take rights from others? If she supports the state blocking someone from marrying their partner because of their gender, what does it matter that she also partners with people of the same gender?
It also completely misses the point. The people advocating for marriage equality aren’t campaigning to force Sue-Ann to get married: even when they succeed, she’ll retain – actually, gain – the choice not to marry. But she is advocating that lesbians and gay people who do want to marry continue to be prevented from making that choice.
In any case, Sue Ann, the fight for marriage equality is only partly about the specific gay people who want to marry. More importantly, it is about gay people not being treated as second-class citizens by the law; about gay people having the same rights as straight people. Whether you want to marry or not, whether being treated fairly appeals to you or not, supporting legislative discrimination against gay people is a dick move.
Even if you’re a lesbian.